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Recursion error crashes universe; ceremony celebrated for its courage
In an unprecedented moment of self-appreciation, a major award show has awarded itself an award for being an award show, triggering what physicists are describing as a “low-grade recursion event.”
“We felt no one else could truly honor what we do, so we did it ourselves,” said the host, accepting the trophy on behalf of the trophy. “We’d like to thank us. We couldn’t have done this without us.”
The universe reportedly stuttered briefly before deciding it was too tired to intervene.