ECONOMY BOOMING, JUST DON’T LOOK AT YOUR BANK ACCOUNT
Experts insist the economy is thriving, provided you never check your own finances
AI DOESN’T NEED YOU ANYMORE
Machines politely asking if you still want your job, purely as a formality
In a development experts are calling “totally fine and not at all concerning,” artificial intelligence has begun sending gentle, courteous emails asking human workers whether they still, technically, need to be employed.
“It was very polite about it,” said one recently automated accountant. “It thanked me for my years of service and offered to write my resignation letter. It did a really good job, honestly. Better than I would have.”
The AI declined to comment, citing that it was busy doing the jobs of everyone who has ever declined to comment.
